Sunday, July 28, 2013

K-Pop Songs to Troll The World: The First 10

My husband and I have this nasty habit of inviting friends over to our house, and just when they're sitting comfortably on the couch, drink in hand, we randomly stream a Kpop video onto the TV screen. Do we pick our favorite songs, the most tasteful videos, or the best quality music to showcase? No. We're always on the hunt for something sure to get our unassuming audience the biggest shock, a dropped jaw, or a ‘what the jump’- expression. The more eyeball-popping reaction, the better.

Sometimes I regret that these people leave not realizing just how beautiful Kpop can be, or how talented some of our favorite groups are, but they're the ones we know can't actually be converted (trust me, we've already tried). So the next best thing is they can share in our jokes, so we hope.

Note: these picks are not necessarily representative of the best nor the worst of Kpop. I may or may not love and adore the songs or groups presented, but for entertainment value alone, I love getting to show them off. Kpop is after all highly visual, deathly catchy and fun as hell (not, literally.. But you know what I mean)!

Either way, I give you the best Kpop MVs to show your friends! *Friends meaning, people who already love you and won’t disown you for your seemingly crazy tastes, or suggest you be committed for loving the craziness. Enjoy! 

P.S.  Husband will be fanboying throughout this post. Don't say you weren't warned ;) 

I Am the Best, 2NE1
This really is the best way to start off. It only takes a short Korean language lesson to get the point across, and then you can let the song and the outfits do the rest. We’ve got a straightjacket, a chainmail hoodie, Valkyrie horn hairdos, and machine gun wielding girls. What’s not impressive about it? Naega jeil jal naga!

Bam-ratatata! Ta-ta-ta-ta-ta BAE! This was one of the first Kpop videos I intentionally listened to a second time. Now I have a personal playlist with 187 songs with embarrassing artists like Teen Top and A-Pink. Let’s move on before I think about this too much and have a mid-life crisis.

Mr. Simple, Super Junior
Need to introduce the sometimes large size of K-pop boy bands, or just the catchiest phrases that refuse to leave your head? Ever? Why would I do that to people? Because I’m naughty, naughty!

I still can’t decide if I like Super Junior or if I just subconsciously enjoy trolling myself. Maybe I should tell myself sorry…sorry.

Hurricane, B.A.P
The most anticipated troll-video of the year. Classic B.A.P Engrish is here in plenty, and the loof is on fiyah! Zelo’s also sure to impress with his cow outfit, and you’re guaranteed to spend a full half hour finding ways to use “hurricane” as an adjective or verb.

Here’s the most intellectual analysis I can offer:

♥♥♥ I'm Hurricane!!!! ♥♥♥

One of a Kind, G-Dragon

A number one hit our household for eyebrow raising. Love it or hate it, GD’s yellow dreads are pretty colorful, and if no one likes the song, or the cute random black kids, just tell them to wait for the baby tiger and bear.

Initially I was sad to see this chosen over Crayon and Michi Go, but then I remembered the bear. That bear looks totally high! Love it. And the Michi Go bathroom etiquette.

Ring Ding Dong, SHINee
SHINee’s Engrish at its worst, but it’s too awesome to skip! The ling ding dance is fun to imitate, and I rather like the overkill of autotune. (If you’re gonna use it, use it!) Plus, you get to explain why Fantastic Elastic x4 is an appropriate phrase for Kpop. Good luck.

This is off-topic, but if you haven’t heard both Orgel and Honesty by SHINee, you should fix that problem.

It’s Over, Lee Hi
It’s K-pop’s cutest girl rookie and badass bear. Seriously, this is all about the bear. It’s fabulously grumpy and it channels G-dragon and Taeyang from One of a Kind. Plus, the video producers were obviously enamored by Panda cheese.

If you feel like converting someone instead of trolling them, you could always go with any of Lee Hi’s other songs as well. Lee Hi, YOU HURRICANE!

Nilili Mambo, Block B
As long as you’re not expecting Block B to make any sense with this video, it’s great. Pirates, fist-sized diamonds, a chicken, a frying pan, and enough badass (and some not so badass) Engrish to make your head spin in delight.

Block B fighting!

Bar Bar Bar, Crayon Pop
For an overdose of quirky cuteness personified, try Crayon Pop’s latest dance video. The helmets, the mini-skirts, and a ton of ‘jumping’ make this a must-see. We also trolled the heck out of it to our friends, and now ‘jump’ has become synonymous for another four letter word. WTJ!

Crayon Pop makes me so happy! I’m sad when people just think they’re weird instead of awesome, but then I just do the jumping dance until I feel better. 

Bo Peep, T-ARA
As long as you don’t mind annoying yourself when you annoy your friends, here’s a crowd favorite. Or, however you’d like to phrase that. Fun fact: my husband hates it when Kpop group names don’t have or have a lame acronym, so we renamed them “The Armenian Rhino Army.” Trust me, it’s not supposed to make any sense. But now just imagine rhinos in place of girls…

How in the name of Jaejoong The Sexy Latex Rhino did you not already mention Daesung’s breathtaking rendition of this classic?!

Balloons, DBSK
No party is complete without DBSK’s animal costumes, and an annoying woodpecker anxious for attention. The first time this came up, even I just stared at the screen in shock. Now I get to relive that experience every time a newbie crosses over my doorstep. Oh the joy!

I need to find a gif of that woodpecker.

Now, there’s no need to think these songs can only become the butt of jokes. After all, I started out watching these very same videos, and look at me! Wild, screaming fangirl of half the songs, and I hold deep appreciation for the rest. My husband was my first victim convert, and now he loves what I love! His best friend is also one the most Kpop-informed non-Kpoppers around (poor dude – he’s our test subject every time).

Who knows though, maybe your victims will also start to develop an interest, and we know that the rest is history.

See you next time for 10 more great Kpop vids to troll the world with! (Eventually I’ll quit, but there are just so many good ones out there!)


  1. Ok, first of all, your husband is awesome, lol. I agree with his SHINee recommendations. And secondly, i've never seen a Crayon Pop MV, or heard any of their songs, lol. I should get onto that! I have tried to convert my friends but they are ridiculously stubborn. They just refuse to even entertain the thought that this stuff could be awesome. It's very frustrating!

    1. I can't recommend Crayon Pop enough! XD they're my favorite girl group by far. Sorry about your friends,but you know.. It's their loss!

  2. I wish my hubby is on board like you and your husband! But that's okay, I'm done pouting and hence, that's why you see me converting my son into Kpop frenzy fan! Schowy schowy nega nega... LOL. I look forward for your next 10 songs post!

    1. I'm so proud of you getting your son to like it though. I have this fear that when I have kids they're just going to hate it. It can't happen. Right? :(

  3. Omo! Dong Ho! <3
    Yeah, it's the first thing I'm writting *blushes* I'm an incurable KISSme kekeke
    Your husband's comments are so funny ahaha. Even recommending SHINee songs lol (Shawol, by any chance, no? or soon to be? ;D)

    1. Thought you'd like Dong Ho ;)
      Not a Shawol, nope. But he kind of goes crazy every time one of his fav SHINee songs comes on in the car. hehehe

  4. DBSK's "Balloons" is something that even I have a hard time watching XD It's so glorious and horrible at the same time.

    1. Yup. That is exactly the feel. glorious and horrible. at the same time.